Travis Dane: 300,000 pages of code. Or 60 minutes of triple-X rubber-and-leather bondage porno. Technology can be used for beauty, or debasement. And until you plug it in, you'll just never know.
[Puts the CD-ROM in the drive]
Travis Dane: Oh, oh! I seem to have brought up targeting codes.
Back in 1992, there was a thriller about a cook aboard a Navy vessel who got stuck with the job of stopping a bunch of generic terrorists. All-in-all, the film wasn't great, but sizable portions were redeemed by the wonderfully over-the-top performance of Tommy Lee Jones. Of course, the good guy was played by Steven Segal, the macho man with the frozen expression. Now, for a reason that has more to do with Segal's ego than a creative impulse, the unsuspecting action-loving public has just had UNDER SIEGE 2 foisted upon it. Those that thought DIE HARD WITH A VENGEANCE was a disappointment had better be prepared for the worst.
Of course, it's a well-known fact that Segal can't act (or direct, for that matter; however, I'll leave ON DEADLY GROUND out of this), but he's far from the only thing wrong with this sorry excuse for a sequel. >From start to finish, the script is stupid, the direction is spotty, the editing is choppy, and the special effects make DOCTOR WHO's notoriously cheesy visuals look like flawless masterpieces. This movie is putrid.
Back from UNDER SIEGE is ex-SEAL operative Casey Ryback (Segal), the man who cooks with one hand while defeating bad guys with the other. This time, he's on a train trip with a pretty niece (Katherine Heigl, turning in a performance as bland as the one from MY FATHER THE HERO). There's been a family tragedy (Casey's brother is dead), but the details are glossed over because the introduction has already begun to drag. Meanwhile, a nutcase named Travis Dane (Eric Bogosian) has taken over a super-secret, invincible weapons satellite and, after devastating China with a blast, he turns it on Washington D.C. Needing a mobile base of operations, Travis and his henchmen decide to take over the train Casey's on, so that's where the so-called action takes place. This mostly consists of Segal running through lots of empty train cars, finding inept bad guys and either stabbing them, blowing their heads off, or throwing them from the train.
As a villain, Eric Bogosian lacks a certain panache. To his credit, the actor tries to foam at the mouth and do all the other requisite things necessary for the audience to hiss at him, but he just doesn't manage it. Everett McGill (TWIN PEAKS) as his sidekick isn't much better. As far as villains go, these guys don't have it. They're boring. Who cares that they intend to kill 8 million people?
During the course of the film, there are three incidents when our stalwart hero seems to be in a little bit of trouble, but terrible visual effects make these more amusing than tense. And then there's the big, joyous conclusion, complete with applause -- talk about cornball. This makes SCENT OF A WOMAN's grand finale look restrained. The whole production might have made a wonderfully campy ride if director Geoff Murphy hadn't taken things so seriously.
I have come to the conclusion that it's impossible for a Steven Segal movie to be anything better than mediocre, and this particular travesty may be his worst yet. The title UNDER SIEGE is supposed to represent the situation faced by Segal's character, but it's equally appropriate in describing the experience of the poor viewer who sits through this film.
By : James Berardinelli
Source: rec.art.movies.reviews newsgroup
Rating: 2
This bastard son of DIE HARD--and there are so very *many* of them!--has a playful awfulness that's missing from the other summer blockbusters. Master thespian and martial-arts expert Steven Seagal returns to the role of Casey Ryback, the former Navy SEAL turned civilian chef. This time, he's taking a train ride through the Rockies. Why? Because he doesn't want to fly, or something like that. (His parents just died in a plane crash. Or was it his brother? Who can tell!?)
Along for the trip is his pretty niece (Katherine Heigl), who gets to spar with her uncle for all of fifteen minutes before she and the rest of the passengers are taken into custody by a band of terrorists. They chose this train because it's there, and because it's such a great way to transport a satellite uplink that will let Eric Bogosian (as the villain, if you can buy *that* one!) control a satellite with truly devastating power. Scary.
Meanwhile, Ryback is hiding in one of the compartments. He's a master of guns, knives, and a mysterious form of yoga that can hold all facial muscles immobile, even during dramatic close-ups. Like UNDER SIEGE, PASSENGER 57, DIE HARD 2, and all the rest of those movies, our hero spends the duration of the film slowly staking the bad guys while trying not to fall in/out/onto something. Of course, Bruce Willis never had to undergo the humiliation of falling off a train ala Gene Wilder in THE SILVER STREAK. Luckily, these bad guys are really not-so-bad guys. They actually back the train up to get him!
By : Michael J. Legeros
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