Dr. David Marrow: Because it was a controlled experiment.
Theo: A controlled experiment? She's in total shock, you can't do that.
Dr. David Marrow: I told you, it wasn't meant to be like this.
Theo: O c'mon, you don't care about insomnia, you just wanted to scare the hell out of us to be fit in your little test or model, in end to understand this. You can't do it...
Dr. David Marrow: LISTEN. You listen to me. I am trying to help people. My field of study is the science of fear, I try to understand why people act the way they act, why they feel the way they feel...
[Theo slaps Marrow]
Theo: You don't feel.
Some houses should never be visited. And some movies should never be remade. THE HAUNTING represents both of those tenets.
A loose remake of the 1963 HAUNTING, this version gives us a creepy haunted house and four hapless people to populate it. Chief among them is Eleanor (Taylor), a real wacko who believes there are children's spirits in the house that speak to her. And she's right! Wow, original! And hey kids, the sexy Zeta-Jones plays a *bisexual* in the movie! Oooooh, scandalous! (Sarcasm, people.)
So how does Jan de Bont, made famous as director of SPEED but best-known as the director of SPEED 2: CRUISE CONTROL, get to make a horror film? He was probably the only sucker in Hollywood desperate enough to take a dog of a film like this. The fact that he's never done a horror flick just compounds the problems.
As a result, THE HAUNTING is not scary -- at all. Instead it's just a conglomeration of cheap fright tactics and a booming bass track meant to get you to jump out of your seat. Which doesn't work.
THE HAUNTING also features such a dumb story line and such bad dialogue it's almost pathetic. For a horror film to be frequently *boring* is unforgivable. And I wager that anyone who bothers to spend money on this lemon won't be able to forgive themselves either.
A really cool set (that ultimately serves no purpose) is the only shining spot in the film. Otherwise, feel free to skip this one.
Sorry Jan: Strike two.
By : Christopher Null
Source: rec.art.movies.reviews newsgroup
Rating: 2
Eugenio Zanetti is the star of this film, no question about it. He's the production designer who created Hill House, a spectacular Gothic mansion that delivers one helluva performance as an ominous haunted house that captures the imaginations of its guests. Zanetti makes rooms collapse, even fold into themselves, and there's a demonic bed whose canopy descends with tentacles like an octopus. Paintings, carvings, statues, even curtains come alive. And there's the slow, ghostly breathing emanating from deep inside. The question is: why would Liam Neeson, Catherine Zeta-Jones, and Lili Taylor want to play second-fiddle to such an incredible creation that, in fact, makes them seem wooden? Looking terrified and screaming is really all that's required in David Self's inane script, based on Shirley Jackson's scare-classic, "The Haunting of Hill House." And the stylistic vision of director Jan DeBont ("Speed," "Twister") truly revolves around the special effects. As the story begins, Neeson, as a devious psychologist, brings three insomniacs to Hill House, outside Boston, for what he tells them is a sleep disorder study. In fact, he's designed the experiment to observe the dynamics of fear, explaining: "You don't tell the rats that they're actually in a maze." But his guests do know that, in the 1800s, a satanic textile manufacturer, Hugh Crain, erected this stately "Taj Mahal" for his beloved wife and their eight children, who are all buried nearby. What no one realizes is that Hill House has become Crain's massive physical embodiment. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, "The Haunting" is a spooky 4, playing tricks with your mind as you munch your popcorn. If you're curious, director Robert Wise made a far more subtle, restrained version (1963), available on video.
